IS THAT POLE MIDGET-FRIENDLY? IF NOT, I’M CALLING THE ADA!
Archive for January, 2011
The picture tells it all!
2011-JAN-16 A recent flurry of scientific reports should remove any lingering suspicion that older people automatically lose their sex drive the minute they hand in their retirement papers.
That’s the good news. The bad news is that too many of these turned-on elders are also contracting sexually transmitted diseases such as HIV, chlamydia and genital herpes.
The National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior, based at the University of Indiana where Dr. Alfred Kinsey led the first large-scale studies of human sexual behavior more than 60 years ago, broke new ground by including the entire age spectrum in its research. It found that many retirees — especially men — remain sexually active into their 70s.
Among women 60 to 69 years of age, for example, 30 percent had vaginal intercourse in the previous month; for men of the same age, the figure was 39 percent. Between ages 70 and 79, the gender difference widens: 12 percent for women versus 28 percent for men.
That gender divide is reflected in an earlier University of Chicago study. Thirty-five percent of women 65 to 74 years of age agreed with the statement that sex was “not at all important” in their lives, compared with only 14 percent of the men. For those 75 to 85, 52 percent of the women and 30 percent of the men agreed with the statement.
Experts offer a variety of explanations for these discrepancies. Because women have a longer life expectancy, there aren’t enough available men to go around. Many single older men prefer to date younger women. But there is general agreement that, more than any other factor, Viagra and other sex-enhancement drugs have drastically altered the playing field, adding years to older men’s active sex lives.
At the same time, most of these reinvigorated seniors are failing to protect themselves from exposure to HIV and other STDs. The Indiana study found that only 17 percent of men 60 to 69 years of age had used a condom during their most recent instance of vaginal intercourse with a “casual partner.”
And according to a recent report from Massachusetts General Hospital, they are paying the piper. The rate of STDs among men 60 and older taking erectile dysfunction (ED) medications, the report said, was twice that of their non-medicated counterparts.
The connection was strongest with HIV, says Dr. Anupam Jena, one of the researchers, in part because its harsh symptoms are more likely to lead to a doctor’s visit than such diseases as genital herpes or chlamydia. That fact has also made HIV the best-tracked STD.
It is often suggested that the incidence of HIV and the other STDs has greatly increased in the past decade, but statistics from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention say otherwise. For the population as a whole, the number of new STD cases reported each year during that period has been stable — and that goes for the elderly as well.
Of course, that doesn’t include the thousands of infected seniors who have few or no symptoms in the short term. They typically go undiagnosed. They may suffer long-term neurological side effects, which can easily be misdiagnosed as standard diseases of aging.
Why don’t older people who are single or philandering protect themselves from STDs?
Experts offer some answers: Because the seniors grew up in an era when the main reason for using a condom was to avoid pregnancy and that’s no longer an issue. Because they don’t realize how widespread genital disease has become. Because the men prefer not to wear a condom and the women don’t want to displease them — a function of the male-dominated relationships of their youth and the current disproportionate number of women.
Aside from their avoidance of condoms, the sexually active elderly are especially vulnerable to STDs. Their immune systems’ ability to fight off infection has weakened with age. And physical changes in women’s genital area leaves them at greater risk for small tears that can lead to STD infection.
A major front line in the effort to reduce STDs among older people is the doctor’s office. Since they don’t think of the elderly as being sexually active, many physicians fail to test older patients for STDs — or to talk with them about their sexual practices in general. “There is essentially no discussion at all,” according to Dr. Jena. “There should be. In particular, the request for a prescription for Viagra should be an automatic wake-up call.”
The prescription-driven sexual revolution among seniors has broadened the horizons of millions of men and women, and it has not gone unnoticed by the manufacturers of sexual products.
Last week, the makers of Trojan condoms announced that their line of vibrators was going to move beyond the shelves of sex shops to be sold in grocery and drug stores. For older Americans, said Stephanie Berez, a Trojan product manager, the marketing expansion will provide “a more comfortable buying experience so they can have a healthy and fulfilling sex life.”
Glad to know that my senior citizens are getting their freak on but please, please use a CONDOM!!!
Why risk contracting HIV at 70?
‘Love Analytix,’ a column all about approaching love with logic over emotion, reviewed the past year and saw there were a lot of lessons about love and relationships to embrace and learn. Now that we are a couple of weeks into the new year, people aren’t just making, but breaking New Year’s resolutions. So, including a few resolutions that help deal with love and relationships may not be a bad idea.
Considering everyone is all about self improvement early in the year — male or female, single or involved, searching or content — these are the top 10 resolutions that we hope can turn into commitments regarding love in the New Year.
10. Stop Living In the Past
Your ex-wife cheated seven years ago, or maybe that guy left you with a baby 16 years ago – don’t let the past rob you of your present. It’s time to change your perception and accept the situation so you can move forward. Living in the past will always cloud the promise of a brighter future.
9. Understand and Respect Differences
Men and women are not the same, and never be. The things that makes us different are the same things that attract us to one another. So respect each other even when you don’t understand each other. No one said love would be easy.
8. You Are What You Attract
If you don’t’ understand why you date loser after loser, or gold digger after gold digger, stop all the blaming and realize you’re giving off a certain energy to have those types flock to you. When you carry yourself in a way that shows what you won’t accept, the type of person you really want will begin to come your way.
7. Take Your Time
Finding love, falling in love, or maintaining love – all require patience. Don’t rush love whether your searching for it, or if you feel you’ve already found it. Time was invented so everything doesn’t happen all at once.
6. Forget About Potential
Don’t concern yourself with a person who likes to tell you what they are “about to do.” Look for those who are truly doing something. Loving someone because you can potentially see them as your dream guy or girl, only makes you tolerate what you hope will change. Those very same things you “tolerated,” will later be the things you possibly resent, but ultimately have to accept.
5. Learn How To Communicate
Females have a tendency not to say what they mean, and the fellas usually don’t say enough. Often, couples and daters have to learn how to fight through these barriers of communication in order to build a foundation that will last. If you want to be about it, you must talk about it.
4. Learn When To Let Go
When things get bad and the pros no longer outweigh the cons, don’t hold on. Especially if it’s just because you don’t want to be by yourself, or if you feel too much time has been invested. So what?! Holding onto someone that isn’t for you is imprisoning yourself, and not giving you a chance to find the love you deserve.
3. Put In Work
Nothing worth it comes easy, and relationships are no exception. The the things you do in the beginning of a relationship when it’s sunshine and rainbows, has to be the same things you do to maintain it. If you are not willing to put in work to sustain a relationship, you will never have a fulfilling one.
2. Love Is Never Enough
Tina Turner said it best, “What’s love gotta to do with it?” Ultimately finding and being in love isn’t just about love. Respect, trust, sacrifice, compromise, timing — the list goes on. If you’re in love, or you want love, remember love is an action word, not a feeling.
1. Love Yourself
Whether you’re in or out of a relationship, know you won’t ever truly be able to love someone else until you learn how to love everything about yourself. Superficial happiness is found in someone else, real happiness is found within you.
This article was written by Shirea L. Carroll is a journalist who has written for Essence, VIBE, Washington Post’s TheRoot.com, XXL’s Juicy, and AOL. Reporting on everything from music and entertainment to celebrity and love, she has interviewed some of today’s biggest celebrity names. Find the NJ native on her blog Invite Only, or follow her on Twitter @InviteOnly to find out “who is and isn’t invited.”
2011 – JAN 10 – The nation paused for a moment of silence this morning in honor of the victims of the Arizona mass shooting that killed six people and left U.S. Rep. Gabrielle Giffords in critical condition with a gunshot through the head.
Among the observances, hundreds of people lined up outside the U.S. Capitol for the silent tribute set by President Barack Obama.
Earlier, Giffords’ husband, a top astronaut who is slated to command the final U.S. space shuttle mission this spring, spoke out for the first time since his wife’s shooting, saying there’s little left to do “but pray.”
Mark Kelly issued his first statement late Sunday, a day after Giffords was shot in the head while meeting with constituents outside a Tucson, Ariz., supermarket. Six people were killed and 14 were wounded. The lone suspect, Jared Loughner, is scheduled to appear in federal court in Phoenix today.
“Many of you have offered help. There is little that we can do but pray for those who are struggling,” Kelly said in a statement posted on Giffords’ congressional website. “If you are inspired to make a positive gesture, consider two organizations that Gabby has long valued and supported: Tucson’s Community Food Bank and the American Red Cross.”
Kelly, 46, made no mention of his wife’s medical condition, but doctors have said they are “cautiously optimistic” Giffords will survive. The 40-year-old three-term Democrat, who was shot in the head, remains in critical condition in a medical coma and on a ventilator. Doctors say she has responded to simple commands.
“Gabby was doing what she loved most — hearing from her constituents — when this tragedy occurred,” Kelly said in his statement. “Serving Southern Arizonans is her passion, and nothing makes her more proud than representing them in Congress.”
In April, Kelly is slated to command what’s expected to be the last space shuttle flight, before the entire fleet retires. But it’s too soon to tell whether he’ll back out of the high-profile Endeavour mission to stay at his wife’s bedside. His identical twin, Scott, is also an astronaut, currently following news of his family’s crisis from thousands of miles up in space, aboard the International Space Station.
“I want to thank everyone for their thoughts and prayers, words of condolences and encouragement for the victims and their families of this horrific event,” Scott Kelly wrote on Twitter from space.
“My sister-in-law, Gabrielle Giffords is a kind, compassionate, brilliant woman, loved by friends and political adversaries alike — a true patriot,” he wrote. “What is going on in our country that such a good person can be the subject of such senseless violence? It’s a sad day.”
This isn’t the first time family tragedy has touched the International Space Station. At Christmas 2007, astronaut Daniel Tani was aboard the orbiter when he learned of his mother’s death in a car-train collision. Tani has been working at Mission Control in Houston this past week and has been in touch with Scott Kelly and other members of the space station crew, The Associated Press reported.
Loughner, 22, was charged Sunday with one count of attempted assassination of a member of Congress, two counts of killing an employee of the federal government and two counts of attempting to kill a federal employee. More charges are expected as well. Among those killed Saturday were a federal judge, a congressional aide and a 9-year-old girl.
A high-profile public defender, Judy Clarke, has been appointed to represent Loughner. Clarke previously defended “Unabomber” Ted Kaczynski and assisted in the case of confessed al-Qaida operative Zacarias Moussaoui.
Friends and acquaintances described Loughner as a pot-smoking loner who lived with his parents and was kicked out of community college recently. College classmates and teachers said he was apt to burst out laughing hysterically at inappropriate times and made bizarre comments that seemed disjointed and out of context.
“I was getting concerned about the safety of the students and the school,” Loughner’s former math teacher, Ben McGahee, told The New York Times. “I was afraid he was going to pull out a weapon.”
Saturday isn’t believed to be the first time the suspect had contact with Giffords. When authorities searched his parents’ home, they discovered a letter locked in a safe there, believed to be a form letter Giffords sent constituents as a thank-you for attending another meet-and-greet event in 2007.
“Also recovered in the safe was an envelope with handwriting on the envelope stating, ‘I planned ahead’ and ‘my assassination’ and the name ‘Giffords,’ along with what appears to be Loughner’s signature,” authorities said.
2011 – JAN 8 – She’s arching her back, moaning and groaning. You’re impressed by your ability to make your lady squirm like that, but deep down your thoughts race between: “What if she’s faking?” and “If not, how do I hit this magic button again?” If you’ve ever been there, or for that matter would like to find yourself in that enviable position, check out these four tricks to make her orgasm.
Put on musky cologne
Smell is the strongest of the five senses when it comes to sexual functioning for two reasons: First, since anything musky mimics testosterone, it’ll kick her libido into high gear. Baby powder can have a similar effect by activating her “scent print,” which links babies to procreation. Second, because smell, sex and memory centers share close quarters in the brain, the scent of arousal leaves the most lasting impression. The second she gets a whiff of your musky cologne, she’ll be transported back to the last time she smelled it on your body.
Warm up her feet
Every guy knows that when a woman hits the sack she loves to wedge her cold feet between his legs to warm up. Warm feet do more to make a woman physically comfortable than just about anything else — even more so if you want her completely naked, which is not likely to happen if she’s cold, even with the lights off. What most of you probably didn’t realize was the importance of warm feet in increasing the likelihood of her experiencing an orgasm. According to Dutch scientists from the University of Groningen, the odds are increased by 30%. Maybe leaving the socks on isn’t such a bad idea after all. If you want to try something sexier, a foot massage with a warming gel can do wonders, especially if you concentrate on the pads of her toes and the webbing in between, which are linked to her nether zones according to reflexology charts. Moreover, lips, hands, feet, and genitals get the lion’s share of brain space, where feet and genital centers are neighbors, making them share sexy information. Why else do you think women call shoe shopping “retail therapy” — especially when they’re not getting any at home and feeling bummed out? So socks or stilettos, you choose, as long as they’re keeping her tootsies warm.
Focus on her 10 o’clock and 2 o’clock
When zoning in between her legs, just as you appreciate her indulging more than just your package, she’d like you to go for more than her hood ornament. If you run your tongue around her clitoral head, concentrating on the 10 o’ clock and 2 o’clock marks on either side, and then gently slip your tongue beneath the hood, you’ll have her moaning from ecstasy. While bang-on is too sensitive, those two sweet spots will make sure that she takes a licking and keeps on ticking, thanks to the bulbs hidden just beneath. The best way to pull off this maneuver is to have her straddle your face as you lay comfortably on your back. She’ll get to lean into the headboard so she can drive the action with ease, since you’ve put her in charge.
Kiss the right side of her spine
Touch on the right side of a woman’s spine makes her melt more so than the left side, perhaps because the left side of the brain controls her right side and it’s the logical side that can talk her into anything. Whether you’re kissing her there, stroking her or gently teasing her with a tickler, just make sure your moves are curvy. You’ll cover more mileage, not to mention get better mileage out of your touch, since it’s significantly more intense than a straight touch.
Time for you to take your tricks for a test drive. With all that attention, her skin will be flushed, her pupils dilated, parts of her shaking, and those she can steady, she’ll be pushing into you — until she’s done and can’t take anymore, that is. Now that’s how to make her orgasm for real.
That’s right purchase a copy of my book, A Blood Like Yours, and you’re automatically entered in a drawing to win a paid dinner at a 4-star restaurant in your city with me. Go to my web site to purchase your copy. http://daisy-roberts.com GOOD LUCK!!
– I am not a book: you cannot read me.
– I am not a subject: you cannot learn me
– I am not a puzzle: you cannot simply figure me out in the course of an afternoon
– I am not the weather: as much as you want to…you cannot predict me
– I am not the court: you cannot judge me.
– I am not a game: you cannot play me
– I am not a notebook: you cannot simply hole punch and label with me tabs
– I am someone like no one else; You just have to get to know me ♥
And then adapt to ME and my Eccentricities!
2011-JAN 04 – Relationships are becoming more & more obsolete because intimacy is the main focus for many people. Friends with Benefits or a “Jump Off” is not an actual relationship, but more of a lustful romance with no strings attached. Men love these types of flings, but what about us women? Can we really handle being intimate with someone on a regular basis without developing serious feelings? Well, I know plenty of women who are able to maintain a clear mind and know that it’s just “Benefits,” but others get wrapped inside of the act of making love and begin to fall in love. Is falling in love a bad thing? It is if you’re the one who is doing the falling and it is not reciprocated because this is a risky relationship and an easy line to cross. So ladies if you’re going to engage in a “Friends with Benefits” type of guy, ensure that both of you understand how these types of relationships work. IT IS STRICTLY SEXUAL. Be sure that this is what you truly want, and make sure the “good getting” is on your time and terms, not his!
What are your thoughts? Would you have a friend with benefits? What if your friend has another friend with benefits, would you mind? Please share your thoughts and comments with me here.
Men love pleasing women, but sometimes they hold back from treating you to the oral action you crave. Here are some sexy tactics to lure him into spending more quality time south of your border.
If you were to rank booty moves by how blissful each feels, receiving oral sex would be in one of the top slots. Not only does this sex style let you lie back while your dude does all the work, but it’s also an ultrapleasurable primer for intercourse…as well as a means to an O in its own right.
Still, too few women are getting the oral attention they desire. In fact, 62 percent of women said they wished their guy treated them to it more often, according to a recent poll conducted by a leading sex therapist.
What could be holding your man back? Although guys have told us that it’s one of their favorite ways to please a woman, a dude may be afraid to ask for direction. Or perhaps you aren’t letting him know that you really want oral sex. Also, some males can be selfish in bed.
Now that you know why he may be a little tongue-tied, follow these seven tactics to get the oral pleasure you desire.
PLEASURE TACTIC 1: Speak Up
Telling your guy that you want more oral is a catch-22: Make too big of a deal out of it and he may conclude he comes up short in using his penis to please you. But if you beat around the, ahem, bush, he may not get the message at all. So when he presses his body against yours to signal he’s ready for the main event, whisper “I’d be really heated up if you’d kiss me down below first.” This assures him that his current moves satisfy you but shows you have one other need you’d like him to address.
PLEASURE TACTIC 2: Groom Your Girl Parts
Guys are visual, so trimming your pubic hair — or going full-monty Brazilian — may be the incentive to get him to linger between your legs. “Seeing a woman’s privates so exposed is still taboo, so it’s very exciting.” The sexy sight should make him want to explore orally.
PLEASURE TACTIC 3: Stir His Competitive Side
Men are naturally competitive. (After all, they are the inventors of beer pong.) So why not take advantage of his inability to resist a contest? Somewhere between a pre-booty make-out session and foreplay, coyly say “I bet you can’t make me climax using just your mouth.” You’ll practically feel his testosterone surge as he takes you up on your challenge.
PLEASURE TACTIC 4: Guide Him with Your Body
One reason he doesn’t spend more time teasing your southern regions may be that he isn’t sure what to do. A nonverbal sign or two as he’s heading below the belt can be the hint he needs.
While he’s kissing your naval, scoot your body up so your pelvis is closer to his mouth, then give his head a gentle push. Or frame your clitoris by making a V with two fingers so he can see where you want him to zero in.
PLEASURE TACTIC 5: Give Him the Right Vocal Cues
Being specific about what he does that makes you squirm will tell him how amazing his tongue is — a big ego boost for guys. A lusty “Right there, yes!” is positive reinforcement your guy will retain so he can treat you to it over and over.
PLEASURE TACTIC 6: Try Guy-Friendly Positions
Grab two pillows, and place one under his chest and one under your hips. This way, his chin won’t dig into the mattress, and with your pelvis raised higher off the bed, he’ll have a greater range of motion. Or have him lie on his back, then put your goods over his mouth. This position will make you feel open and vulnerable but also lets you control the pace and motion.
PLEASURE TACTIC 7: If He Holds Back
Withholding oral sex from him may be the one thing that snaps him out of his self-absorbed state. If not, you may have to accept that some guys are truly oral-averse. If you decide that you can’t be with someone who doesn’t love pleasuring you, consider letting him go and start dating one of the gazillions of men who do.
Pre-order a copy of my acclaimed book, “Candy Apple Panties,” for more suggestions and tips on male and female oral satisfaction by visiting my web site: http://daisy-roberts.com